From the start of this week,
i have been struggling with God..
this struggle is getting hard to handle..
Yes, i know to trust in Him
to pray to Him.
I do pray but somehow my trust in Him is gone,
my faith in Him is gone..
sigh..
19 Sep
the packed food
the black sesame pasta ting brought for me
spreading it on my bread
peach yogurt blend - yanxiang
ha! 不ugly啦 liting.. =)
the taste is.. .. ..not to my liking..
and so ting brought it home again..
my bag carried by HaoRen
why when he carry it doesnt look like a war bag,
but when i carry it looks exactly like im reading to go for war?
hmmm
Dinner with parents before Korean Lessons
i miss eating with them,
i miss spending time with them,
but yet when i have the chance to be with them,
i cant control my temper,
i cant control my frustration.
Lord, i prayed to You for me to be patient in tribulations,
i prayed to You to help me see others with kindness & compassion,
but yet why Lord?
nothing is changing.
Lord, where are You?
아어지 Nasi Lemak
어머 니 Yong Tau Foo
Char Kway Teow - shared!
After eating all those wasn't full,
got a craving for fried food..
and here jaslyn goes.. .. ..
Butterfly Bun!
Korean Lessons
snapped a picture of our teacher
GRADUATED!!!
i'm thinking of continuing on to Intermediate
but time?
can i afford the time?
Lord, i really need You
Walking Home
just feel like taking some photos hoping to convey the alone,
emotional, lost feeling..
20 Sep
my attire to Orchard
the top Cheng Long gave w a 3/4 pants + a belt
okay?
OF ALL HUMAN RACE,
I ACTUALLY SAW KIRA!!!
people close to me will know the story..
i'm too lazy and emotionally drained to type it out..
Thanks miss tan shimin..
for entertaining me during that period..
for listening to my cries, my complaints, my whine..
for telling me how God still is there even though you are not a believer..
Lord, why didnt You stop me when i stubbornly chose to stay?
why didnt You provide me a way out?
and most important of all,
WHY did You let me see KIRA?
I really feel stupid, brainless, dumb..
and while walking home,
i said out LOUD to myself how i don't deserve Jesus
how Jesus would definitely not die for my sins if i am e only person left in the world
how dirty, evil, disgusting, gross, sinful i am that Jesus would never come into my life..
and that is why i am not changing..
Because i am tooo TOOOO sinful!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
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WHICH IS ALL RUBBISH, SO NOT TRUE i know..
because Jesus loves us,all of us including ME..
but.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..
if so, where is Him?
(miss please, u are in class, please dont cry)
was thinking not to go church,
turn myself away from Him,
because i do not deserve to go,
because i seem to not have faith in Him,
but on
21 Sep
i still went for the service..
Praise Lord for Amelia & Jackie..
i know God wants me to share,
to tell them my struggles
But somehow,
i cant seem to find the right words.. .. ..
i really do want to open up and share
and confess all the feelings that i'm struggling with,
but something in me is blocking it!
and that is what is suffocating me!!
Lord, help me! i need You Lord.
Why is God giving me all this during my birthday season?
initially i was so looking forward for my this year birthday.
because its my first birthday with Him..
celebrating with Christians..
But.. .. ..
everything is.. .. .. .. ..
Lord, give me strength..
Let me understand that "i can do all things through Christ which strengthens me"
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